These are some book notes and takeaways from Dereck Sivers he came away with from Mark Manson’s book, “THE SUBLE ART OF NOT GIVING A F*CK.”
The key to a good life is giving a fuck about less, and giving a fuck about only what is true and immediate and important. Learn how to focus and prioritize your thoughts effectively – how to pick and choose what matters to you and what does not matter to you based on finely honed personal values.
Say “fuck it” to everything unimportant in life.
The point isn’t to get away from the shit. The point is to find the shit you enjoy dealing with.
What most pampered people consider “life problems” are really just side effects of not having anything more important to worry about.
Suffering is nature’s preferred agent for inspiring change.
Happiness comes from solving problems. To be happy we need something to solve.
Nobody who’s actually happy stands in front of a mirror and tells himself that he’s happy.
If you feel crappy it’s because your brain is telling you that there’s a problem that’s unaddressed or unresolved. Negative emotions are a call to action and positive emotions are rewards for taking the proper action.
Just because something feels good doesn’t mean it’s good. Just because something feels bad doesn’t mean it’s bad. Emotions are merely signposts or suggestions. Make a habit of questioning them.
People over-identify with their emotions. Emotional intuition, without the aid of reason to keep it in line, sucks.
I was in love with the result, but I wasn’t in love with the process. And because of that, I failed at it. The common cultural narratives would tell me that I gave up on my dream. The truth is, I thought I wanted something, but it turns out I didn’t. End of story.
The easier and more problem-free our lives become, the more we seem to feel entitled for them to get even better.
Technology has solved old economic problems and given us new psychological problems.
The rare people who do become truly exceptional at something do so because they’re obsessed with improvement, which stems from an unerring belief that they are, in fact, not that great at all. It’s anti-entitlement.
The vast majority of your life will be boring and not noteworthy, and that’s okay. Accepting your mundane existence will free you to accomplish what you truly wish to accomplish, without judgment or lofty expectations.
If what we value is poorly chosen, then everything will be out of whack.
Good values are
1) reality-based
2) socially constructive
3) immediate and controllable.
Bad values are
1) superstitious
2) socially destructive
3) not immediate or controllable.
If you’re miserable in your current situation, it’s because you feel like some part of it is outside your control – it’s a problem you have no ability to solve, or a problem that was thrust upon you without your choosing.
William James conducted a little experiment. Spend one year believing that he was 100 percent responsible for everything that occurred in his life, no matter what. During this period, he’d do everything in his power to change his circumstances, no matter the likelihood of failure. James would later refer to his little experiment as his “rebirth,” and would credit it with everything that he later accomplished in his life.
We are responsible for everything in our lives. We always control how we interpret what happens to us, as well as how we respond.
Change is as simple as choosing to give a fuck about something else. It really is that simple. It’s just not easy.
An educated mind can entertain a thought without accepting it.
If you’re stuck on a problem, don’t sit there and think about it; just start working on it. Even if you don’t know what you’re doing, the simple act of working on it will eventually cause the right ideas to show up in your head.
To build trust you have to be honest. That means when things suck, you say so openly.
The only way to achieve meaning and a sense of importance in one’s life is through a rejection of alternatives, a narrowing of freedom, a choice of commitment to one place, one belief, or one person.
Travel shows you that another society can live with entirely different values and still function.