Common sense meditation

sp sunset by s hughesWhen I was young any interest in a transcendental experience was supplanted and snuffed out by the lure of lust, love, and other shiny things.

The physical realm’s attraction was too strong, and its more realizable results were too enticing. After my hormones peaked, those drives lessened. The possibility of reaching or uncovering a stable state of joy became more interesting, and easier to explore through meditation.

“Enchanted by” is the best way to describe my view of what meditation can do. Meditation seems like the best direction to take in pursuing an awakened state.

The way it seems to be is: your ego is your attachment to the constant stream of thoughts and internal chatter. Recognizing that attachment put you on the way to letting go of the  preoccupation with the thoughts bubbling up and drifting away.

I used to run a lot and was pretty good at it but I didn’t get a “runner’s high,” I just liked doing it. That’s what meditation is like for me too. I enjoy doing it but don’t experience a big shift in my outlook. I think something subtle is happening.

A few days ago, I got an email from a nephew who’s interested in meditation. The next day, I happened across a post on meditation by Leo Babauta with some easy-to-follow advice. So, instead of reinventing the wheel I thought I’d give a shortened version of Leo’s tips.

What’s one of the most important feelings for people to have? I think it’s enthusiasm. Without enthusiasm not much gets done, but with it who knows what’ll happen. That’s why I think Leo’s first tip is really significant. It is: start by meditating for just two minutes. Two minutes isn’t daunting and is easy to do and get behind. An easy way to maintain your enthusiasm while you’re building a habit.

Here’s what Leo has to say:

The most important habit I’ve formed in the last 10 years is meditation. Hands down, bar none.

Meditation has helped me to become more peaceful, more focused, less worried about discomfort, more appreciative and attentive to everything in my life. I’m far from perfect, but it has helped me come a long way.

Probably most importantly, it’s helped me understand my own mind. Before I started meditating, I never thought about what was going on inside my head — it would just happen, and I would follow its commands like an automaton. These days, all of that still happens, but more and more, I ‘m aware of what’s going on. I can make a choice about whether to follow the commands. I understand myself better (not completely, but better), and that has given me increased flexibility and freedom.

While I’m not saying it’s easy, you can start small and get better and better as you practice. Don’t expect to be good at first.

These tips aren’t aimed at helping you to become an expert … they should help you get started and keep going. You don’t have to implement them all at once — try a few, then come back and try one or two more.

  1. Sit for just two minutes. This seems ridiculously easy, to just meditate for two minutes. If that goes well, increase by another two minutes the next week. By increasing a little at a time, you’ll be meditating for 10 minutes a day in no time. But start small first.
  2. Do it first thing each morning. It’s easy saying “I’ll meditate every day,” and then forgetting to do it. Instead, do it every morning when you get up, and put a note that says “meditate” somewhere where you’ll see it.
  3. Don’t get caught up in the how. People worry about where and how to sit, it’s not that important. Start by sitting on a chair, on your couch, or on your floor. It’s just for two minutes at first anyway. Later you can worry about optimizing it, but in the beginning it doesn’t matter, just sit somewhere quiet and comfortable.
  4. Check in with how you’re feeling. As you first settle into your meditation session, simply check to see how you’re feeling. How does your body feel? What is the quality of your mind? Busy? Tired? Anxious? See whatever you’re bringing to this meditation session as completely OK.
  5. Count your breaths. Now that you’re settled in, turn your attention to your breath. Just place the attention on your breath as it comes in, and follow it through your nose all the way down to your lungs. Try counting “one” as you take in the first breath, then “two” as you breathe out. Repeat this to the count of 10, then start again at one.
  6. Come back when you wander. Your mind will wander. This is an almost absolute certainty. There’s no problem with that. When you notice your mind wandering, simply  return to your breathing. You might feel a little frustration, but it’s perfectly OK to not stay focused, we all do it. This is the practice, and you won’t be good at it for a little while.
  7. Develop a loving attitude. When you notice thoughts and feelings arising during meditation, as they will, look at them with a friendly attitude. See them as friends, not intruders or enemies. They are a part of you, though not all of you. Be friendly and not harsh.
  8. Don’t worry too much that you’re doing it wrong. You will worry you’re doing it wrong. That’s OK, we all do. You’re not doing it wrong. There’s no perfect way to do it, just be happy you’re doing it.
  9. Don’t worry about clearing the mind. Lots of people think meditation is about clearing your mind, or stopping all thoughts. It’s not. This can sometimes happen, but it’s not the “goal” of meditation. If you have thoughts, that’s normal. We all do. Our brains are thought factories, and we can’t just shut them down. Instead, just try to practice focusing your attention, and practice some more when your mind wanders.
  10. Stay with whatever arises. When thoughts or feelings arise, and they will, you might try staying with them awhile. Yes, I know I said to return to the breath, but after you practice that for a week, you might also try staying with a thought or feeling that arises. We tend to want to avoid feelings like frustration, anger, anxiety, but an amazingly useful meditation practice is to stay with the feeling for awhile. Just stay, and be curious.
  11. Get to know yourself. This practice isn’t just about focusing your attention, it’s about learning how your mind works. What’s going on inside there? It’s murky, but by watching your mind wander, get frustrated, avoid difficult feelings … you can start to understand yourself.
  12. Become friends with yourself. As you get to know yourself, do it with a friendly attitude instead of one of criticism. 
  13. Do a body scan. Another thing you can do, once you become a little better at following your breath, is focus your attention on one body part at a time. Start at the soles of your feet — how do those feel? Slowly move to your toes, the tops of your feet, your ankles, all the way to the top of your head.
  14. Notice the light, sounds, energy. Another place to put your attention, again, after you’ve practice with your breath for at least a week, is the light all around you. Just keep your eyes on one spot, and notice the light in the room you’re in. Another day, just focus on noticing sounds. Another day, try to notice the energy in the room all around you (including light and sounds).
  15. Really commit yourself. Don’t just say, “Sure, I’ll try this for a couple days.” Really commit yourself. In your mind, be locked in for at least a month.
  16. You can do it anywhere. If you’re traveling or something comes up in the morning, you can do meditation in your office. In the park. During your commute. As you walk somewhere. Sitting meditation is the best place to start, but in truth, you’re practicing for mindfulness in your entire life.
  17. Find a community. Find a community of people who are meditating and join them. 
  18. Smile when you’re done. Be grateful you had this time to yourself, that you stuck with your commitment, that you showed yourself that you’re trustworthy, that you took the time to get to know yourself and make friends with yourself. That’s an amazing two minutes of your life.

Meditation isn’t always easy or even peaceful. But it has benefits, and you can start today, and continue for the rest of your life.