New Accelerators in 2014

Here’s a story from Detroit scheduled for release on Sunday, April 1st.

The major US auto manufacturers have announced they will begin equipping all 2014 cars and trucks with power assisted accelerator pedals.

The sixties brought the introduction of power steering. Power brakes followed in the seventies. Both advances began showing up in luxury models and trickled down over the years to all models.

It’s the opinion of the major car manufacturers in Detroit that the lack of foot pointing power is widespread enough that all models need to be equipped with power accelerators within a year and a half to avoid potential operational errors.

Internal studies funded by the “big three” have shown that Americans are heading down a slippery slope of sloth faster than expected.

We’re now not only exercising less, but actually avoiding exercise whenever possible. That trend, in combination with our standard American diet is resulting in newer levels of physical weakness.

The ability of many adult Americans to point their toes forcefully enough to depress an accelerator pedal has been steadily decreasing for the last 15 years the study claims.

The inclusion, by the American auto manufacturers, of the power assisted accelerator pedal is also seen as a leap ahead of the competition from Germany and Japan.